Rise and Shine

Dear People Of My Subdivision,
I wanted to first thank you for the warm welcoming we receive when we moved into the neighbourhood last summer. While we didnt attend many of the gatherings, I thought it was a very a considerate gesture to invite us. No doubt you are aware that we are first time homeowners and I really appreciate your patience regarding our dead grass and the Christmas lights that are still up.

It is because of your kindness that I feel I must confess my dirty little secret. I am an irresponsible pet owner. Before you jump to conclusions, I need to tell you that I really do have the best of intentions. It's just that at 6am I am not thinking rationally, or thinking about much at all. So, when you're out taking care of your lawn or playing touch football with the kids and step in something that isn't so pleasant, it's entirely my fault. To be honest, there have only been four incidences where I neglected to clean up in the past three months.

I do promise in the future, to be more conscientious of my actions and those of my pets. However, if you haven't bothered to shovel your sidewalk and my dog decides to take advantage of your front lawn, I guarantee you that I'll just leave that plasticbag in my pocket.

Sincerely Your New Neighbour Who Walks In The AM,
-jamie

Popeye

I hate spinach. I really do. I can tolerate it when it's accompanied by a metric ton of dressing or in a flavor full dish. But when it's the shining star of the show? Not so much.

I want to like it, really I do. It's green and good for you, blahblahblah.

Every day, I have a minipep really in my office. Who is having spinach for lunch?! I am! Who is gonna love it?! I am!

No.

As I start to chew, all I can think about are the babies that died a couple of months ago while eating it.

flucky.

Y'know what I am awesome at?

Obviously not grammar.

It's misplacing things.

I am also really lucky (not in a lotto/coffeebean counting/casino way but more the finding things way.)

Example:
I went to leave for work this morning and got into my car.. ..owhere is my purse!
Not under the seats.
Nope, not in Jason's car.
Oyeah, not anywhere in the house either.
O!

It's at Kroger. Specifically, the Lost and Found.
As I was waiting for the lady to retreive it, I thought about how yesterday I was so proud about being able to complete my entire shopping experience while on the phone with Lala (multitasking diva!). I should have known that this was too advanced for someone who generally has difficulty just walking and drinking at the same time. It's probably best that I don't like to talk on the phone and drive.

So, once again I was very lucky. All of my cards/checkingbook/crap were still safely in my purse. As the women handed it back she gave me the 'You were really lucky this time' look and all I could say was, "yeah I know."

I guess I'd rather be lucky this way because if I ever won the lotto I'd probably lose the check they'd give me.